It’s OK to be vulnerable.
I’m still trying to make peace with that statement. There are times when I think I am OK with being myself, but letting people, strangers, see me, at my worst…panic attacky, angry, whatever – going against what I consider the emotional and behavioral social grain… it’s really scary and it makes me feel really insecure. Today I had to leave somewhere because I couldn’t deal. On top of that, I wasn’t feeling well, was having an anxiety attack, and was completely embarrassed in front of other people.
You do what you have to do. You trust that people will understand. You take it easy, be gentle with yourself. And even if you don’t believe it, say to yourself: It’s OK. Because it is. You have more power than you think you do. And it’s beautiful.
Hello there! Well, it has been a while since I have posted anything, and I think a mostly positive update is in order:
1. I am so excited for my brother. He got into grad school for media studies. Woohoo! Go go Amy’s brother!
2. I signed up for a real Spanish class (not online). I am stressed about it. That is all.
3. I’m still working.
4. I’m still going to therapy.
5. I signed up for This. The first month was spectacular.
6. Discovering new music, as always. This time I’ve been led to The Decemberist’s 2010 album, and I rediscovered Tom Petty’s Wildflower album as well as an REM Collection CD (1982-2011) It’s so so Sweet!!!
7. I am reading a book called Just One Thing: Developing a Buddha Brain One Simple Practice at a Time. It’s an amazing and transforming book for me to read.
8. One of my sunflowers came up! It’s beautiful! It’s red (it’s an autumn mix of seeds).
So there’s my happy update 🙂
And since this blog has a focus on wellness, I want to take this time to remind myself, and yourself, that living a life of wellness is important. There are so many things I can list here: getting enough exercise, eating the right foods, reading good books, working hard, being keeping your commitments and being social,forming positive connections, living simple and tidy, personal hygiene, etc. It can be overwhelming, there’s so many things. Just keep at it. And remember to relax and zone out everyday. I believe that that is also a part of being well 🙂
So, be well.